Thought I’d check in & update. GP was superb, could not have asked for someone to be more empathetic without feeling in the slightest bit patronising.
I think one of my biggest fears was that I would be made to feel like I was wasting their time. I didn’t at all,
It was very much ‘this is a horrible thing for you to go through, this doesn’t make you a bad or a weak person, it just means your usual coping strategies have been pushed too far, we can try & fix this’ the relief was immense. I don’t think I’d been aware of how bloody frightened I was by it all.
I Obviously I cried, felt a burk for crying, apologised constantly. He told me it was fine & something he was used to,
I described everything as I did with you guys.
I was given details of how to access counselling & a short course of low dose sleeping tablets.
We discussed medication but as in the early days side effects can increase feelings of anxiety, I’m not ready to try that.
He talked to me very frankly about what to do should the feelings escalate to those of suicide.
I’ve been signed off work for another week & I’m back to see him next week.
Yesterday I felt better. I think the main thing is that the fear that everything I was feeling was out of control has subsided slightly. Asking for help & being told ‘we can try & help you’ felt like I was taking back a bit of control.
I’m still incredibly anxious, but I’be been given some hope that this will pass & I will be ok.
Thank you again to everybody who took the time to reply to my post. I was dithering about whether it worth going to the GP, I’m glad I did & I’m very grateful for your kind words xxx